It is finally summer! No more school, no more waking up early and getting my uniform ready, none of that! Just a bunch of family fun and going out swimming with friends! Or that’s what I want to imagine.
Summer means that my birthday is coming up, same with the town fair and lots of loneliness. Out of all my friends from school-including the girl I hang out with, No one talks to me but my best friend who goes to a different school so, I haven’t seen her at all in a very long time. I actually feel quite lonely. My friend who I hang out with makes plans with other people, I just stay here at home alone. I have my family, yes. Sadly that’s another thing. We are all suddenly just apart. I don’t know if we will even go out this summer. Who knows. My aunt promised to take me to the beach. She never did. I have never seen the ocean, you know? I’ve always wanted to see it, I want to feel the white sand on my feet, smell the oceans essence, feel it’s temperature and be carried away by its waves to some far away island where no one can bother me. I know I know, I’m complaining about feeling lonely, but I like the loneliness sometimes. I’m used to it. Even though I have my family with me all day, I still feel alone sometimes. I don’t know why, first world problem? Well, I don’t think that constant sadness counts as a first world problem. I get depressed sometimes. I don’t like talking to anybody about my feelings. I have tried it before, they all just say the same thing or just don’t care.
Recently my crush asked me out to the movie theater. I was so happy and surprised I just couldn’t believe it! He said that he would buy the tickets and tell me later at what time. We would go the next day. I was waiting and waiting and he never messaged me. At night I decided to message him and he said that we wouldn’t go tomorrow, but the day after. I said alright and the next day he messaged me the time but he was serious with me, like if he were to be mad. We were to meet up but…he just never replied to my message asking if he was going to show up or not and well…he just never messaged me again after that. I don’t know why I let myself be carried away by him once more. It was too perfect to be true.
The town fair is around the corner. I don’t have anybody to go with. Maybe if I’m lucky my ‘friends’ will invite me. If it’s not me the one who has to invite them. My classmates just sometimes hate each other or something I don’t know. I don’t know how they could not get along, I mean, that’s ok, we’re humans after all. Maybe they’re bipolar….makes sense? I mean, they do talk to each other but all of a sudden they’re biting each others limbs off with words and nasty looks. Maybe I just don’t understand it because I’m not that type of person. I get along with everyone and try talking to everyone unless if they don’t want me to which in social media, that’s what happens. they’re all too busy about how many likes their selfies get. But oh well, once again, I’m a caring and nice person. I can’t help it. Sadly, lots of people aren’t like me and don’t care unless if its them. If they need something, they will talk to me. That’s how it works most of the time.
So, this summer will also be my birthday woo. I’m actually very grateful for it, ya know? I’m not a religious person, but I do believe. Therefore I’m very grateful for all that me and my family have and for my birthday coming soon. Thanks God! U da best, m8! Summer is here and I don’t know what to expect from it. What I really do know, is that this blog will be up and running all summer. Who knows, maybe things do get better! Maybe this summer I won’t feel so lonely anymore. 🙂 This blog already helps out a lot with that. ^^
So, yeah. Thanks. 🙂 Also thank you for all those who have read, visited, liked or commented on any of my post! It makes me happy to know that people actually find my things interesting! Especially for all my followers! All 10 of you, thanks! I know I only have 10 but whatever I’m happy and proud about it! Which is what counts. I’m also happy with all the comments, views and visits. It warms my heart up, it helps me feel not so lonely. 🙂 feel free to check out my blog anytime. Everyone is welcomed to the dark side. We have cookies.